I have been reading self-development and wellness books since I was 19 years old, starting with #1 on our book list, which absolutely revolutionised my relationship with my self, or at least planted the seeds.
Before you go through this list, I want to mention that I believe that the books don't hold all the answers we need, hence why I tend not to read them anymore. Reading self-development books can become an obsession and this obsession can have you believing that you don't have the answers, that you need more books. And when one book doesn't make your life better, then either (a) that book was shit, or (b) you just need a different book, or more books. Those could be true, and, what if you took the time to let all that wisdom settle in? Gave your whole heart to practices with your Self? Let there be time and space to let your own wisdom come in. Books can spark something within you, a wisdom, that you didn't realise you had.
The truth is, the books doesn't make changes for you, you do. It's up to you to discern what you're willing to take away from it, what you want to ignore, and how dedicated you are to implementing practices.
With that being said, here are a list of my absolute favourites in the order that I read them in (the list is short because I'm very particular. You'll thank me later):
1. You Are Enough by Cassie Mendoza-Jones
Great for: Comparison, Confidence, Self-Worth
This is the first "self-development" book I picked up. I walked into the book store, walked around, waited for something to stand out, and this was the one. The first book I ever picked using my intuition.
Cassie, who is now my mentor (LIKE WHAT?!?! Pinch me), is a kinesiologist, naturopath, author, Life Coach among other things. The books she writes (you'll see another one coming up soon) contain content that the she has experienced and worked through herself.
I love the way she writes because it doesn't feel like she's bossing you around, it feels more like a loving friend is writing letters to you, and occasionally drops in easy, fun activities centred around self-awareness.
I learned a lot about having compassion for myself, understanding comparison and the foundations of beliefs from this book. Every girl and woman should read this.
2. The 7 Secrets of Happy Healthy Relationships by don Miguel Ruiz Jr. & HeatherAsh Amara
Great for: Relationships (romantic, family, friendships, colleagues), Emotional Wellbeing
I first picked up this book because I thought I didn't have good relationship skills because I had been in a toxic relationship prior to my boyfriend (who is now my husband). I thought it would give me tools to make our relationship better, to "fix" problems, and in some ways it did. What it really taught me was mental and emotional tools for coping when any kind of conflict arose with anyone.
3. Open Wide by Melissa Ambrosini
Great for: Self-Exploration, Self-Love, Relationships, Sex
I thoroughly enjoyed this book and have gone back to read certain segments again since being a Life Coach. I think it's a great starting point for anyone who is new to the self-development area and wants to focus on their relationships to themselves, their partners, friends and family.
I haven't read this in so long I can hardly remember most of it! I just remember feeling as though it was a fun self-development book, particularly if you're new to getting to know yourself.
4. It's All Good by Cassie Mendoza-Jones
Great for: Perfectionists, Control Freaks
I told you Cassie would be back! This book is all about understanding the core concept that no matter what you do or how you do it, everything is going to be okay. And if you don't believe that, might I recommend you read this book?
I read this book with my business in mind and you could make it work for any context of life. This book (alongside the next book on the list) taught me what it means to trust, to let go of force and control and perfectionism.
4. Make It Happen by Jordanna Levinn
Great for: Making Life Changes, Manifestation, Everything
Holy moly. This book has been foundational in creating the life that I live right now. I first started reading this in 2019, and it took me a good year to finish it, because I wanted to soak it up and understand the concepts as much as possible.
Like Cassie, Jordanna writes in a way that doesn't feel pretentious. Both authors share vulnerably from their own experiences so you know that the tools and wisdom they provide actually works. And similarly to You Are Enough, this book came to me randomly and intuitively: I was walking through Target on my lunch break on my way to the stationery section. As I passed the book section, from the corner of my eye I noticed MIH and couldn't stop looking at the front cover. When I put it back, I felt the urge to pick it up again, so I boguht it on a "whim" (actually my intuition) and I'm so so glad I did.
Make It Happen had me reassessing the way I think, how any little action helps move the needle along, and most importantly, what it means to have faith.
You do not have to be spiritual to read this book, just fyi. You'll find out soon that manifestation isn't telekinesis, that you're probably already doing it, and how to make small shifts to change the outcome of the life you're manifesting.
5. Untamed by Glennon Doyle
Great for: Empowerment, Understanding Women
I wouldn't actually say that this is a self-development book, as there are no little activities for you to do. It is simply a retelling of pivotal moments in Glennon Doyle's life and what she learned along the way.
I liked this book, particularly for women, because it tells the story of so many of the women before us, and how we still hold onto those limitations, how we still put ourselves in cages, and that we are now in a safe environment to be free. I also loved the way it was written--she is a great storyteller, and the stories come in short sharp hits. This is a very enjoyable read. I would hand this to every woman if I could.
6. Come As You Are by Emily Nagoski
Great for: Sex Education, Relationships (romantic or sexual)
Read The Seven Secrets of Healthy Happy Relationships if you want light, simple, easy reframes and tools to make your intimate life better.
If you are ready, willing and able to take on some heavy-duty science, this book is for you. I had myself re-reading entire chapters to wrap my head around what she writes. I love the way she writes--she puts her own quirky spin on her analogies where she can to make it fun and easier to understand, and uses true stories from her clients (she is a sex therapist).
This book came to me again through intuition. I woke up several days in a row with "Come As You Are" by Nirvana stuck in my head, very loudly. Not too long later and I had this book in my possession.
I learned a lot about myself sexually from this book. It gave me more compassion for myself rather than trying to change the way that I am, and also allowed me to understand my husband's point of view too.
This book is not solely for those in a relationship either. Everyone needs sex--it is a staple part of our wellbeing.
7. Period Repair Manual by Lara Briden
Great for: Women, Periods, Natural Health
Every woman and young girl needs this on their bookshelf. It gives statistics, talks about safe non-hormonal contraception, what certain foods or minerals to encourage particular hormones at certain points of our cycle and why. She even covers PCOS. It's incredible. And I haven't even finished it.
This is one that I would flick to if ever I had trouble with my period again. All the important knowledge (and habits) I have surrounding my own cycle come from this book and using the FAM method.
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I would LOVE to know if you end up buying any of these books to read! Send me a photo on Instagram @ashlopezherbaut.
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P.S. This is all personal opinion, no sponsorships.
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